Are you one of those people whose temperament, mood and even life outlook are largely influenced by the weather? I am. Bright sun makes me happy and by contrast, grey wet days make me sad. This summer was different though, as warm as it was, as fiercely as the sun shone, life and all it brought with it was not my brightest period. The constant feeling of having too much to do weighed down on me more than ever, made me feel oppressed but also listless. The version of myself that always meticulously planned weekends started to reject the rigidness, but inevitably, I moaned when a ‘boring, unplanned’ Saturday rolled around. I wanted to travel but I couldn’t actually make the time, I wanted to relax but my mood prevented me from doing so. And above all, most of the time I didn’t even get what I needed to do done because I felt unable to focus and command my own attention.
I can’t blame the weather this time, the weather was perfect, days on end of glorious warmth and sunshine which normally fill me with energy but didn’t seem to have any effect this time around. So with that, it seems that I must admit that sometimes, life throws at us certain events and situations that not even a Maltese summer can overcome.
And that my dear readers is Caroline’s long-winded way of apologising profusely for the utter abandonment of the past few months. I’d like to say I’m back with a bang but the likelihood is that this will be a process and there’ll be days during which all I want to do is write and others when I simply can’t. As much as I would like to, not all my life and thoughts can be shared here and sometimes, on certain days, I need to be alone. So please forgive the lack of updates, here and on social media. I haven’t stopped, I haven’t forgotten you all and my focus will regain. It’s almost a new season after all.